


Burn

by M_Logolepsy



Series: Hamilton-Inspired TAZ [1]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Idk what to tag this tbh, end of stolen century spoilers, hamilton au that i was working on with tfw disc, it's more like hamilton inspired but idk it's breaking my heart either way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-24
Updated: 2018-03-24
Packaged: 2019-04-07 06:43:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14075205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/M_Logolepsy/pseuds/M_Logolepsy
Summary: These words, these innumerable pages, had been her life for the past one hundred years. They chronicled the lives of her best friends, of the creation of her family.Now, she had to let them all drown.





	Burn

Lucretia stood alone in the dark of her bedroom when she destroyed her whole world. Illuminated only by the light from Fisher’s tank, she stared down at her notebook. These words, these innumerable pages, had been her life for the past one hundred years. They chronicled the lives of her best friends, of the creation of her family. 

Now, she had to let them all drown. 

“I wrote every word that you told me, from the moment you said them,” She whispered to no one. 

For a long moment, she felt insane. She must’ve be out of her mind, sitting alone, talking to a fish and erasing her life’s work. Then, she remembers what her life had been for the past one hundred years, and she pushed on. How could it get any stranger?

“Your stories became mine. This family became mine. You all became mine.” 

She stared down at her pages again, thumbing through some of her favorite tales from the beginning of their journey. Her first conversations with Magnus, their senseless joking, the strange bond they began to form, and the trust that he put in her to tell him when a fight was too far for him. Then, later, when she, Lup and Taako locked themselves away for the first time, drinking together and wasting their evenings on that fourth world and the last wine on the ship for the cycle. She had bookmarked so many moments like those- a time she and Barry had played stupid, childish games to pass the time when they were the only ones who had survived until the end of a cycle, another where Davenport taught her how to fly the ship and she almost cried (and he almost did, too), and another where she and Merle almost buried themselves alive and had a long conversation about what love was. There were so, so many stories like these, of her family and her beloved place in it. She glanced back over to Fisher, knowing that he was staring at her and her work hungrily. 

“Do you know what Lup said when I fought through the judges and won?” She asked him, even if he couldn’t answer. She still did, recalling, “Be careful with Cretia, everyone. She’ll do what it takes to survive.” 

She paused. She had to, as the tears started to come to her eyes and she choked up. “I can’t do this, can I? These six people are my family. They’re the only people in any plane in existence that understand me and what we’ve been through. They’d never be able to remember me ever again, and I’d be alone.” 

The voidfish floated in his tank silently. 

Lucretia sighed at herself. “That’s selfish, I know. I’m one person. The seven of us, we’re not… We’re not  _ gods.  _ We can’t come to this world and allow it to be destroyed by our own hands just so the Hunger doesn’t destroy it. They all… They flooded my senses. Their love left me defenseless… They built a home out of broken planes, they built sanctuaries. I’m still weak, though, because I’m still searching and scanning for a better answer in every line, for any sort of sign that they could still be mine.” 

She stares down at the latest page- a retelling of their latest argument when they rejected her idea of the bubble again. She knew that she could do this. Even if they were cut off from everything, they could at least be safe. They couldn’t keep flying away, and they certainly couldn’t keep doing what they were doing now. They’d never let her do it as they were now. 

Lucretia’s face hardened. “I can’t let the world burn.” 

She stood, approaching Fisher’s tank and holding her journal out from her chest. She wouldn’t forget this. Maybe that would be the hardest part. 

She took a deep breath, all too aware of Fisher’s eyes on her. “I’m erasing myself from their memories. An entire century will be redacted from all of their minds. The world has no right to suffer for us. The world can’t die at our hands. So what, they won’t know who I am?”

Her voice shook as she fought to continue, rising frantically as sobs wracked her body. “I’m burning their memories, burning our family, so millions of others can survive. I forfeit my right to their hearts! I forfeit my place in my home! I’ll save this world instead!” 

Before she could lose her confidence, she dropped the journal into the tank, allowing Fisher to consume it. 

“So what if I all have of memories of when you were mine?” She cried out. 

“Lucretia?” 

She gasped, turning to face the door. There, in the doorway, carved duck in hand, was Magnus. 

“God, Magnus, no… You weren’t supposed to see this, I’m so sorry, Magnus,” She whispered, horrified.

She could already see that Fisher’s meal had affected him. His eyes seemed hazy, and he wavered where he stood. She ran to him, holding his arm and trying to make sure he didn’t fall. 

His eyes met hers, full of recognition for what might be the last time. “What did you do--what?” He whispered, voice weak. 

She couldn’t help the sobs shaking her. “Magnus, please- this is just for a little bit, I’m gonna stop this, what we’ve done to this world. I’m gonna find you a place where you can be happy again, it’s just for a little while, and then, you’ll remember, I promise.” 

He was staring at her, but that last light of recognition faded from his eyes. He barely breathed out,  “Who are you?” 

“I can do this Magnus, please,” She begged to a man who didn’t know her anymore. “Please just lie down, I don’t want you to fall and hurt yourself.”

She carefully eased him to the ground, trying to help him as gingerly as possible. He was too pliable, not saying anything else and quietly following her lead. 

“I love you, Magnus, I love all of you. I’m sorry, it’ll be over soon,” She promised him. 

Magnus kept breathing, but where he lay he fell completely, horrifyingly still. His eyes remained hauntingly open, only rarely blinking, and his stare fell completely blank. Lucretia’s stomach sank, and she fell to her knees beside him. She wanted to hold him close, to keep promising him that everything would be alright, but she was a stranger to him. She was a stranger to all of them. 

Oh, god. What had she done?

**Author's Note:**

> thanks to everyone on the taz writer's discord for yelling about hamilton with me and helping me write this hit on myself <3


End file.
